No news on the adoption front. We still have not gotten a referral. This made me think about waiting. Sometimes, we don’t have a choice. The situation is out of our control and we’re told to just WAIT.
I am not a very patient gal, and really don’t like when I can’t control everything. I am Type A personality with a Capital T.
When we were doing the paperwork, it somehow felt like we were “doing” something to make progress, even though so much of it was out of our control too. Now, we just check e-mails much too often and every time our agency calls my heart pretty much goes out of control with its wild beating.
We spend so much of our lives waiting. It always seems that when we get to the next stage that we are waiting for, everything will be better. We will become better people, our lives will have more order, control and happiness.
When we are single we think that when we get married everything will be fantastic. Then we can’t wait to have children, buy a house with a picket fence and enjoy our family. Then we can’t wait til our kids grow up a little and we can get some sleep and peace (or so I’m told. I guess having toddlers means you don’t have a life, never sleep and take showers once a week, LOL). Then our kids grow up into surly teenagers with teenager problems and we can’t wait til they grow up, settle down and we can stop worrying about them so much. And on and on and on. It never stops, does it?
I realized something though. I don’t think I’ll be a different person, be happier and enjoy life more once we finally bring the children home. Even though there are times when I think I’ll simply bust if we don’t get a referral RIGHT NOW!
I can be just as happy right now.
I don’t have to live life as though I have my foot on the brake pedal, just waiting to finally ease off and press the accelerator. I am “living” right now.
I have an amazing husband and God has blessed us SO much already. I know that’s enough. I don’t have to look around my apartment with frustration, just waiting to enjoy my surroundings when we finally buy a house. We have a cozy home and I love it. I can enjoy the fact that Sergi doesn’t have to spend hours mowing the lawn and if the refrigerator breaks, we don’t have to fork over the cash for a new one. I don’t have to wait until all my ducks are in a row for me to start doing what I love. I have a tiny apartment kitchen and a hand me down dining room table that only seats four, but that doesn’t stop me from enjoying sharing our home with others, and some of the best memories were created with everyone crammed around our small table. Serving the food buffet style is an awesome option too:) By the way, invest in some folding tables, then you can even invite 20 people and still have a place to seat most of them.
While I wait for the things that are out of my control, I can move on with the things that I can do.
I can read books about parenting to prepare myself. (As much that is possible; I’m sure I’ll learn a lot more once I actually have children). I can invest in my marriage and make it better and better. A great marriage is a choice and I want to make mine as wonderful as possible. It’s nice being able to sleep in on the weekends, be spontaneous with our free time and bond because there’s no one else around. We can save money for a house and avoid so much stress and headache. Dave Ramsey says that if you buy a house without a good Emergency Fund in place, Broke, Desperate and Stupid move into the spare bedroom:). We also know pretty well what we do want in a house since we know our likes and dislikes by now.
This winter, Sergi and I heard about Jon Acuff’s Quitter conference and we were able to pack our bags and drive to Nashville, Tennessee. Just like that. It was fantastic and were so glad we went. Jon Acuff is a best selling author and is a speaker. He also works for Dave Ramsey’s team.
I continue blogging about food and sharing recipes and cooking tips with others. It’s so rewarding to hear comments from readers and know that others are finding the blog useful.
I could go on and on, but you get the idea.
We always think that it will “be better” over the horizon without realizing what wonderful stage we are in right now and savoring the moments that we have today. What are some things that you put “on hold” till more improved times?
The things that happen today will be the memories that we savor in the future, living them over and over again in our minds. Make these moments worth remembering and savor them today, because TODAY is that golden, beautiful time.
Keep praying for our adoption and for our children. We appreciate all your support.